Discovered this bit of knowledge the other day, I'm sure its been covered somewhere in the past, but I'll share it with you anyway.
How to tell if you have been deleted from a friends contact list in MSN Messenger In the MSN Messenger Main window, choose Tools > Options > Privacy. If you right-click on an email address and it allows you to delete, then you yourself have been deleted from that users MSN Messenger account as well. If the delete option is greyed out, that user still has you on his/her contact list.