Lou's first computer

[David]

Costello: Hey, Abbott!
Abbott: Yes, Lou?
Costello: I just got my first computer.
Abbott: That's great, Lou. What did you get?
Costello: A Pentium II-400, with 64 Megs of RAM, a 18-Gig hard drive, and a 48X CD-ROM.
Abbott: That's terrific, Lou.
Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!
Abbott: You will in time.
Costello: That's exactly why I'm here to see you.
Abbott: Oh?
Costello: Yes! I heard that you're a real computer expert.
Abbott: Well, I don't know . . .
Costello: Yessir-EE. You know your stuff. And you're going to train me.
Abbott: Really?
Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.
Abbott: O.K. Lou. What do want to know?
Costello: I am having no problem turning it on, but I heard that you should be very careful how
you turn it off.
Abbott: That's true.
Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want to turn it off. What do I do?
Abbott: Well, first you press the Start button, and then . . .
Costello: No, I told you I want to turn it off.
Abbott: I know, you press the Start button . . .
Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it Off. I know how to start it. So tell me what to do.
Abbott: I did.
Costello: When?
Abbott: When I told you to press the Start button.
Costello: Why should I press the Start button?
Abbott: To shut off the computer.
Costello: I press Start to stop?
Abbott: Well, Start doesn't actually stop the computer.
Costello: I knew it! So what do I press?
Abbott: Start.
Costello: Start what?
Abbott: Start button.
Costello: Start button to do what?
Abbott: Shut down.
Costello: You don't have to get rude!
Abbott: No, no, no! That's not what I meant.
Costello: Then say what you mean.
Abbott: To shut down the computer, press . . .
Costello: Don't say, "Start!"
Abbott: Then what do you want me to say?
Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to press the Stop button, the End button
and Cease and Desist button, but no one in their right mind presses the "Start" to Stop.
Abbott: But that's what you do.
Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.
Abbott: Don't be ridiculous.
Costello: I'm being ridiculous? Well, I think it's about time we started this conversation.
Abbott: What are you talking about?
Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.

------------------

[rustedtight]

quote:Originally posted by David

Costello: Hey, Abbott!
Abbott: Yes, Lou?
Costello: I just got my first computer.
Abbott: That's great, Lou. What did you get?
Costello: A Pentium II-400, with 64 Megs of RAM, a 18-Gig hard drive, and a 48X CD-ROM.
Abbott: That's terrific, Lou.
Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!
Abbott: You will in time.
Costello: That's exactly why I'm here to see you.
Abbott: Oh?
Costello: Yes! I heard that you're a real computer expert.
Abbott: Well, I don't know . . .
Costello: Yessir-EE. You know your stuff. And you're going to train me.
Abbott: Really?
Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.
Abbott: O.K. Lou. What do want to know?
Costello: I am having no problem turning it on, but I heard that you should be very careful how
you turn it off.
Abbott: That's true.
Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want to turn it off. What do I do?
Abbott: Well, first you press the Start button, and then . . .
Costello: No, I told you I want to turn it off.
Abbott: I know, you press the Start button . . .
Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it Off. I know how to start it. So tell me what to do.
Abbott: I did.
Costello: When?
Abbott: When I told you to press the Start button.
Costello: Why should I press the Start button?
Abbott: To shut off the computer.
Costello: I press Start to stop?
Abbott: Well, Start doesn't actually stop the computer.
Costello: I knew it! So what do I press?
Abbott: Start.
Costello: Start what?
Abbott: Start button.
Costello: Start button to do what?
Abbott: Shut down.
Costello: You don't have to get rude!
Abbott: No, no, no! That's not what I meant.
Costello: Then say what you mean.
Abbott: To shut down the computer, press . . .
Costello: Don't say, "Start!"
Abbott: Then what do you want me to say?
Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to press the Stop button, the End button
and Cease and Desist button, but no one in their right mind presses the "Start" to Stop.
Abbott: But that's what you do.
Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs, and Stop at green lights.
Abbott: Don't be ridiculous.
Costello: I'm being ridiculous? Well, I think it's about time we started this conversation.
Abbott: What are you talking about?
Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.

------------------

David, Bill is not gonna like you for this. LOL

[Spike]

That's funny. Maybe Microsoft should rethink their caption for their 'Start' button...but what?

[David]

quote:Originally posted by spike

That's funny. Maybe Microsoft should rethink their caption for their 'Start' button...but what?

In many of the Microsoft Longhorn Alpha's, it is just the flag, no text.

[kyuubi]

lol....smart....real smart....

[Quiksilver]

i never thought of that...using the start button to turn off the computer haha...thats hilarious... I like it david...hahahahahaha..... wow thats just great...

[David]

quote:Originally posted by David

In many of the Microsoft Longhorn Alpha's, it is just the flag, no text.

You can do it in Windows XP as well.



String table > 37/38 with reshack on explorer.exe.

[Jeff]

Why would you ever turn off your computer?

[Spike]

You know, that brings up a whole different topic. How often do people leave their computers on? Hmm...I hear a poll idea coming on *rushes to Polls forum...*

[Spike]

quote:Originally posted by David
String table > 37/38 with reshack on explorer.exe.

Where can I downlaod a free Resource Hacker?

--Thanks.